Ricky Perilous Fhtagn, Part the Second.

It's good to have connections. Still, I have often wondered why that eccentric old man, whose visage and torn shirt adorn the posters of man and woman alike, needs the money. Maybe he owes Priceline a favor? It's what I call the 10-10-whatever effect. During the apex of those miserable commercials for whatever the 10-10-__ service provided, we saw many curious instances of huge stars more or less debasing themselves onscreen. Why did they do it? What money could Danny Glover truly need from these people? Carrot Top I can understand. But Danny I'm-too-old-for-this-substance Glover?

If I'm ever famous--not internet famous, I mean like movie famous--I'm going to keep all my financial holdings in a monolith-like tower, all Scrooge McDuck style. I cannot guarantee that I will swim in it. But I will guard it. Terminators from every franchise that has used the term--so, the Schwarzenegger movies cyborg, the elite space marines from WH40K, Deathstroke from DC, and even the little RC car things from Deathtrack --will surveil the entrance to ensure I never lose that money and have to subject myself to those 40-second eyesores.

stub | 09.01.08 | Permalink